#659 Friday 3 August

She slept.
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We're having  an interesting time at school with medications ..... Kaylia's medication has a very real, strong effect on the school situation and the discussions are showing me that there is confusion about the task of each of the medications.  Risperdal has the task of reducing her stimming .... allowing her to focus her mind on the moment.  Without this focus, she cannot learn.  Risperdal does not make her happy or reduce anxiety .... it tries to slow down the 'bouncing ball' inside her mind.
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Lovan however aims to calm her anxiety.  When in the grip of an anxiety attack, Kaylia is unable to think at all .... it's as though she is trapped inside a ball of worry .... she tries to cope by focussing on her routines ... sets of known behaviours.  This is unpleasant for people around her and it must be horrible for her.
The Lovan breaks the worry/anxiety cycle so she relax and be her normal happy self.
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The two medications work very differently in her body .... Risperdal is a long-term drug that takes about a week to have any effect.  It also has a nasty side-effect of stimulating appetite and weight gain.   Lovan on the other hand works almost immediately .... it takes about 10 minutes for it to have an observable effect on her behaviour.  It also has no side effects within the correct dosage.  Once the correct dose is exceeded, it actually has a reverse effect .... it causes anxiety!
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Over the past 6 months we have learned to split the daily dose into smaller amounts.  Because Lovan seems to be a fast acting drug, it also loses effect quickly.  Instead of giving it to her once a day, we have learned to give smaller amounts when she is first showing signs of anxiety.  That way, the anxiety can be controlled through the day.  This has made a huge difference to our life.  When she is in the grip of an attack, we can actually help her!
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On another topic .... today I accepted a quote to sell all my tools and machinery from my shed. It's hard to do .... but it has to be done sometime .... and the money will be very welcome at present. The guys will come on Monday to empty the shed. The idea is for them to take anything of value ... and just leave stuff to take to the dump.
I feel that it's an end of that part of my life. In the foreseeable future, shed activity will be beyond my physical capacity .... so it's better to do the disposal while I am able. It's not a task that should be left for someone else.